October 19, 2016

Separated parents & arrangements for Christmas

The shops are already displaying the first signs of Christmas by promoting tins of our favourite chocolate treats as well as offering deals if Christmas grottos are booked early.

For parents who have divorced or separated the idea of Christmas approaching can bring added anxiety and worry especially if it is the first Christmas the family will have experienced living in separate households.  So what steps can be taken to try to avoid an otherwise stressful Christmas?

It goes without saying that planning ahead in relation to matters concerning children will help. A last minute court application will not be high up on anyone’s Christmas list.  However, in past years I have spent the days leading up to Christmas in court acting for parents who have not been able to reach an agreement over Christmas holiday arrangements. So planning ahead really can assist.

Try to reach an agreement about the Christmas holiday period as much in advance of the event as you are both able to. Consider having an agreement in place with the other parent to alternate Christmas so that the children can spend Christmas Day with each parent on alternate years.

If communication between you is difficult then consideration should be given to attending mediation to help you both reach an agreement. We can refer you to a local specialist mediator if you are considering this.

It is important to remember that even if the children are not with you on Christmas day you can make the days you spend with the children over the Christmas holiday period just as special and the children will love the chance to have two Christmas days.  Ensure the time you each spend with the children is special but don’t try to outdo each other with presents. Try to discuss together the presents the Children would like and agree how the presents are to be handed over. Maintain family traditions you have established as a family where possible.  It might not be a tradition you have known yourself as a child, but it may be one that the Children are used to. Always, of course, remembering to leave out food for the reindeers!

If you are worried about raising the issue of Christmas with your former partner or spouse consider making an appointment with myself or one of my colleagues in Holmes & Hills’ specialist team of Family Law solicitors.  Holmes and Hills Solicitors offer an initial fixed fee consultation for a reduced fee.  This meeting will enable you to discuss your particular concerns with one of our specialist family lawyers who will offer advice and guidance specific to your circumstances and needs.

And finally to those who celebrate the season, may I be the first to wish you a stress free and Happy Christmas.

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